Finding Sacred Space: Rabbi Faryn Borella and Or Shalom’s Vision for Bernal Heights

In the heart of Bernal Heights, a community that values inclusivity and connection, sits Or Shalom — a synagogue with deep roots and a progressive vision. Founded in the late 1980s by three women in interfaith relationships who sought to create a Jewish community that reflected their values, Or Shalom has grown from an after-school program in a living room to a vibrant Reconstructionist synagogue serving the neighborhood and beyond.

Bernal Connect sat down with Rabbi Faryn Borella, the current spiritual leader of Or Shalom, to discuss the synagogue’s history, its place in the Bernal community, and Rabbi Faryn’s journey to the rabbinate. In our conversation, we explored what makes Or Shalom unique—from its early embrace of interfaith families and questioning minds to its musical traditions and progressive values—and learned about exciting developments as the congregation expands into a newly available downstairs space in their building.

Join us as Rabbi Faryn shares insights about Reconstructionist Judaism, the congregation’s vision for their future in Bernal Heights, upcoming events, including their annual ethics lecture featuring Rabbi Dr. Armin Langer, and the joyful celebrations planned for the upcoming holiday of Purim.

Let’s start with some of the organization’s history and background.

Or Shalom was founded in the late 1980s and early 1990s, primarily by three women in interfaith relationships. They were looking around at the options for Jewish life in the city. They didn’t see themselves reflected in what was available, both in terms of accepting interfaith families, the type of Jewish education they wanted for their kids, and their progressive politics.

It started just as a school, an after-school program for kids. The framework, which was very different than Jewish education at the time (although not that different than now), was that the kids had to want to go. There was no forced Hebrew school. If you’re in the Jewish community, you understand being forced to go to Hebrew school as a kid. The idea was that no kid could be forced to go to the school. It had to be voluntary, and it was up to the teachers to create a compelling enough environment for the kids to want to attend.

So, it started just as a Jewish education program for kids in Bernal Heights in the living room of one of our founding members, just a few blocks from our new building.

Is it in preparation for a Bas Mitzvah or Bar Mitzvah?

I don’t think it was explicitly for that purpose. It was just Jewish education in general. But the children of our founding members were among the first B’ Mitzvot in the community. I don’t remember what year that was, but the synagogue was formally incorporated in 1991. It was doing youth education for a couple of years before that.

Or Shalom identifies as a reconstructionist community. What does that mean? Could you explain that?

Reconstructionism is a denomination of Judaism. Similar to the different strands of Protestantism, Reconstructionism is one of several Jewish movements. Most people have heard of the main Jewish movements, Reform, Conservative, and Orthodox, although Orthodox encompasses many different things. There are some smaller Jewish movements, including Reconstructionism, or what the movement is called today, Reconstructing Judaism. There’s also Jewish Renewal. Those are two smaller denominations within what’s called liberal Judaism, which includes Conservative, Reform, Reconstructionist, and Renewal.

Are there certain tenets that they align with?

Interestingly, in its founding, Or Shalom wasn’t officially Jewish Renewal, but its founding Rabbi, Rabbi Pam, was ordained in Renewal. Jewish Renewal is considered neo-Hasidic – an egalitarian revival of certain Jewish mystical traditions. So Or Shalom has some Jewish Renewal roots and influences as well.

Reconstructionism came with our second-lasting Rabbi, Rabbi Katie, who was trained as a Reconstructionist. She advocated for the synagogue to be formally incorporated as a Reconstructionist synagogue. Some of the tenets of Reconstructionism make it a very intellectual tradition. The founder, Rabbi Mordechai Kaplan, had a main tagline: “The past gets a vote, but not a veto.” The idea is that we’re drawing upon the deep wellspring of Jewish tradition, but we’re creating Judaism that’s relevant to our contemporary times. We’re drawing upon Jewish wisdom and the wisdom of the day. We’re carving pathways toward new Judaisms relevant for people in contemporary times, evolving Judaism to be relevant because it’s not useful if it’s not relevant to the Jewish people of today.

Where does Kabbalah fit in?

Jewish Renewal is, in some ways, an egalitarian revival of Kabbalah and one of its offshoots, Hasidism. Kabbalah is a mystical tradition that started in medieval times. I remember Madonna going down that path for a few weeks.

Within Judaism, Kabbalah still influences Hasidic and Jewish Renewal communities and is integrated elsewhere. It was seen as very radical in its time and not accepted into the mainstream, but now, many practices across all Jewish communities incorporate Kabbalistic thought.

For example, we just had the holiday of Tu B’Shvat. One of the core practices for that holiday, a new year for the trees, is a Seder based on mystical wisdom that the Kabbalists created. This Seder is similar to a Passover Seder but different. This tradition started in medieval times and used to be done only by Kabbalists. Still, it’s universalized, and many people across different Jewish traditions will do a Tu B’Shvat Seder.

And it’s for welcoming spring primarily?

Yes, it’s the idea that it’s the time of year, at least in biblical Israel, when the sap would start rising in the trees. It’s that transition point between winter and spring, honoring and marking that transition.

Tell us a little bit about you. How did you end up being a rabbi? What’s your journey?

I’m originally from Vermont, a small town in southern Vermont. I’m the result of an interfaith marriage. My mom is Jewish, my dad is not Jewish and never converted, but I was raised Jewish at this small-town synagogue in Vermont.

If your mother’s Jewish, you can be too, right?

Yes, that’s the traditional view. In our denomination, Reconstructionism, as long as any parent is Jewish, you’re considered Jewish. But traditionally, it ran through the maternal line, and in certain denominations – Conservative and Orthodox – it’s still that way.

Growing up in a primarily Protestant area, it was unique to be Jewish, and I valued that upbringing. It wasn’t religious, but it was very communal. I loved the music, the services, and the community. I never thought I would become a rabbi, but looking back, you can see signs.

One of the primary rabbis I had until I was 11 was involved in peace work in Israel and Palestine. He fostered my interest in this work, which I became invested in during college and afterward. Ultimately, that work led me to the rabbinate.

And then, what is the process of becoming a rabbi?

In the liberal denominations, it’s going to a rabbinical school, similar to a seminary. It’s usually a five to six-year program. I went to the Reconstructionist Rabbinical College outside of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania. I kind of did it hodgepodge – I was at the Graduate Theological Union in Berkeley for two and a half years and then went to the Reconstructionist Rabbinical College for four years.

How does one get picked for the community? Do you seek out the community? How did you end up in Bernal Heights? In some Christian denominations, it’s more that you’re assigned – like if I’m thinking of priests.

It’s not like that at all for rabbis. It’s volitional. In your last year of school, they do a lot of work supporting you in finding job opportunities and guiding you through the application process. For congregational work especially, there are particular things about applying for jobs. Still, you pick which jobs you want to apply to, and it’s an interview and review process like any other job.

With congregational positions, the final candidates, usually two or three, are invited for a weekend. You lead services, teach classes, and meet the community. Then, the candidates decide if they like the community, and the communities decide if they like the candidate. Ultimately, they pick who their next Rabbi will be.

What is unique about the community in Bernal versus other communities?

I think there’s a lot of overlap between what we offer and other synagogues in San Francisco, and there are also things that make us unique. From what I’ve heard from founding members and longtime members, something that has made us unique historically is that we were one of the earliest to accept interfaith families. We have had non-Jews in leadership, even up to and including the board president, which was especially rare back then. Some of these things are becoming more common in certain spheres, but there were many ways in which Or Shalom was ahead of its time.

Another distinction is that it’s always been okay to question the existence of God at Or Shalom, which wasn’t necessarily welcomed in other communities. We have a group called the Considering God Salon for atheists, agnostics, questioners, or God-curious people—anyone who doesn’t want to accept things at face value. They meet four times a year to discuss different topics and create space for being Jewish without requiring any specific relationship with the divine.

We’ve always been a very musical community, which isn’t exclusively unique, but it’s something special about us.

Many of our founders were part of the anti-war movement of the 1960s. Many hippies, leftists, and progressives started the community and instilled it with progressive values that continue to make us stand out in San Francisco.

Or Shalom is queer-friendly, correct?

It’s almost like it’s not even a question for us. One of the beautiful things about Judaism is that, at this point, there are so many different forms of liberal Judaism. I sometimes forget that “religion is oppressive to queer folks” is still a perception.

Of course, inevitably, even for people attempting not to engage in homophobia, it’s like the air that we breathe. So, our community could unintentionally contribute to that culture. But Or Shalom in no way says, “Our religion teaches us that queerness is bad or transness is bad.” Rather, It’s very much about looking at the ways the Torah endorses and celebrates queerness and transness, knowing that it can and does get interpreted in other ways. The Torah is an expansive enough founding document that you can find liberatory approaches to gender and sexuality as much as oppressive ones.

You must be in the midst of a transition, as I’ve seen the space downstairs open up. Tell me a little about the transition, what’s happening, and what should be coming up in the new space.

It’s been a very slow-moving process. We had long-term tenants downstairs, and when the building was purchased (before my time), the tenants were arranged to mutually agree that the building would turn over in a couple of years. We got access to the upstairs earlier, but we had to go through a process with the planning commission for a conditional use permit. It was zoned residential but hadn’t been used as a residential property in many years.

Now that the downstairs space is also available, we’ve engaged with a team of architects guiding us through a master planning process to design it to best serve as a sacred space for our community.

What does that mean regarding the expansion of what you’ll be offering?

We’re running into the fact that we’re growing, and the space is a certain size. The hope is that it can be a sanctuary space, a social gathering space, and an educational space, both for adults and children. When we’re not using it, we can rent it out to community members for events, making it a resource for the community.

It’s a multi-use space, but we acknowledge its limitations. Some programs run out of the building, while larger programs require renting space elsewhere.

As we progress, we can move more programs in-house while acknowledging that some of our bigger programs will never fit into this building.

Do you partner with other Jewish organizations for those events?

We primarily rent space from churches. We hold our holidays at the Unitarian Universalist Church, run Shabbat services at Noe Valley Ministry, and use St. Aidan’s. For the bigger events, we rent space between these three locations.

That leads to how interfaith communities interact in San Francisco and how you’re part of that.

We’re trying. We hope to build a solid solidarity coalition with the other religious organizations in Bernal Heights. We’ve already done some collaborative programming with the Islamic Center, and we’re hoping to do more and partner with the churches, though we haven’t done that yet.

We are also part of Faith in Action, which works across San Francisco and the Bay Area. Different faith communities and individuals primarily support refugees and immigrants, so there are other ways we’re engaging in interfaith efforts.

How do you balance the traditional Jewish practices with today’s world?

That is the motto of Mordechai Kaplan and Reconstructionist Judaism. His idea is that the world is always changing, and Judaism has always changed along with the times. A lot of our education as Reconstructionist rabbis looks at how there’s never been such a thing as “traditional Judaism” – Judaism has changed drastically over time and in different parts of the world, depending on the influence of surrounding cultures.

When we change, that’s the most Jewish thing we can do. Modernity has imposed traditionalism, but change has been the core experience of Judaism over time. Judaism—a land-based, place-specific tradition—has survived for thousands of years because it has adapted and evolved to work in different geographic locations and times under different leadership and religious rule.

As Mordechai Kaplan put it, the core practice of Judaism is finding a way to keep practicing our tradition in a way that is relevant to us as modern individuals. Judaism has so much to offer, but not if we consider it something from the past. We’re using tradition to form how we relate to our world today.

How do you interact with the Bernal community at large

I think we’re still growing and building those connections. We’re fortunate that many of our members live in Bernal, so it’s a nice neighborhood. We’ve heard from many unaffiliated Jews in the neighborhood that they’re excited we moved here and that because we’re here, they might affiliate for the first time and are excited to have a Jewish resource in the neighborhood.

We’re part of the Bernal Business Alliance, even though we’re not a business because building those connections is important. We’ve participated in different holiday strolls, movie nights, and the pet parade – we’ve been trying to participate in neighborhood events. And even with all that, some still say, “Wait, what? There’s a synagogue here?”

You’re upstairs, so there’s no street-facing presence. That may change when you open up downstairs.

Exactly. We started running some programs downstairs, albeit it’s unclear what we are yet because the walls are bare – it’s very bare-bones. It’s funny because there are those big windows, and we watch people walk by as we’re doing a program, looking in and trying to figure out who we are. The sign still says we’re a pickle shop.

What are some of the upcoming holidays and events that you’re focused on?

This weekend, we are bringing a scholar-in-residence to town. His name is Rabbi Dr. Armin Langer. He is both a rabbi and a professor. He’ll speak at our Friday night Shabbat services, but the big event is on Sunday. It’s our annual ethics lecture, our second annual ethics lecture. He’s our ethics scholar in residence and will speak on Jewish approaches to immigrant and refugee issues this Sunday at 10 a.m. at the JCC.

Very topical.

Exactly. The way these ethics lectures were designed – they were endowed by one of our members, Stephen Gerard, in honor of his parents – the idea is that these are a free resource open to the entire San Francisco Jewish community and beyond. If people want to come, they are welcome. It uses Jewish frameworks but is free and open to the public. It’s not just for the Or Shalom community; it’s for the wider community, and we encourage anyone who wants to come. You can find out more on the website for the actual title of the lecture and other details.

The next holiday is Purim, which is March 13th. We will hold two programs, one in Noe Valley at Noe Valley Ministry and one in Bernal.

Purim is often thought of as Jewish Halloween. It’s a holiday where you’re supposed to dress up in costumes. The idea is that everything gets flipped on its head. It’s all oriented around a story written as a political satire about Jews facing persecution and their response. It’s a carnivalesque holiday where you’re supposed to get weird and silly – everything gets turned upside down, extreme, animated, and playful.

It’s a complicated, fun, and complex holiday, especially in these challenging times. Thursday night, we will have a big Purim party at Noe Valley Ministry. One of the practices of Purim is a Purim Spiel, which is a very silly play.

The following Sunday, we’re waiting to hear back from the city to confirm that it’ll be our second annual Purim Carnival at the Bernal Heights Rec Center Playground. We also did it last year, with carnival games for kids—ring toss, spin the wheel, and others—and a costume parade up and down Cortland Avenue. That event is more targeted towards young families.

Is there anything else you would like to add?

There has been such a warm reception in the neighborhood. It’s a wonderful neighborhood; we feel like we’re part of a community, not just on a random street. We love to meet new people. One of my favorite things has been being at Progressive Grounds or walking down the street and people saying, “Oh, you’re the rabbi,” or running into congregants or people who’ve been to services, or people just knocking on our door saying, “I see you’re a synagogue, would love to talk.”

Those encounters on the streets and in Bernal’s restaurants and coffee shops are some of the sweetest parts. So, if people are curious about us, don’t hesitate to stop by.

Change as Tradition: Or Shalom’s Reconstructionist Approach

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